Category: Daily Logs

0

I, Quit

his is in response to when Sophia says that now she can attend law school. Dorothy says, “Ma! By the time you get out you’ll be 90.” That’s when Sophia dispenses this bit of wisdom. It’s not about doing things that make you eligible for something else, it’s about doing things for your own personal fulfillment. There’s a speech that went viral which now is a book where a professor said, “You are not special.” If you listen to his speech, like I did a couple days ago, it’s not really about not being special in as much as it is about fulfillment. Where I have to disagree that you’ll only find fulfillment in selflessness, I do agree that many individuals they only do things for their academic stature in order to qualify for something else. This is all well and good, as knowledge should be used, but learning can be fulfilling in itself. Gaining more understanding and more skills for yourself can be quite satisfying when paired with an outlook of creativity and discernment. Of course, his dissertation was speaking mostly about upper class high school students.

0

What Makes A Creep?

I’ve been thinking lately about creeps, ever since I sat next to that guy at the furry nightclub who I thought was a creep.

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My Beautiful Rats

These are my beautiful rats, Ratchet and Clank. They’re both kind of fat because they don’t get enough exercise. I’m actually allergic to rats, but I love having them. I’ve always tried having rats, but until now it hasn’t always worked out. But, I’m doing a good job with these guys. I got them when they were just weened, and they love me and Maus as their parents. I guess this is my version of a little gay dog heehee.

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If He’s Bothering You

So I worked at Starbucks today, trying to get my sleep schedule back on track. Need a little coffee assistance. Anyways Roger was there, he’s okay to talk to though he seemed a little...

2

Most Fun Weekend Ever

I say this tongue in cheek. I was very very angry this weekend. But at the same time, I was very scared. You see, my weekend involved getting hog tied by the police, carried out of my apartment in a canvas burrito-stretcher, injected with haldol, and shackled for hours to a hospital bed. How was your weekend?

0

Unreality

I have problems with too much focus. Sometimes obsessively. I also have strange rats, and I’ve kicked a coffee habit. Oh yeah, check out this website I made.

7

Broken Fingers, Broken Dreams

Broke my finger, had deja vu, helped pack meat, made a cake, visited nephews and nieces, sold game, just a week in the life.

0

Passive Income

I proposed to Maus that we try to do something simpler than we’ve ever done first. I suggested we make a basic visual novel. Just a choose your own adventure style game with music, text, and graphics. Maus was like, “That’s so boring!” but I was like, “No, really, you want to prove we can make something, then let’s make something!” So, Maus and I are going to start working on our first visual novel. We’ll see how that goes.

4

When Bad Things Happen

Sometimes bad things happen to good people, but you know, sometimes bad things happen to bad people too.

0

Being Rich

I like being rich. I daydream sometimes about how something I do will make me super wealthy one day and mostly about what I’d do with it. I’m such a hedonistic capitalist. Well, I wouldn’t say hedonistic by my standards, more selfish. That’s not a bad thing!

7

Looking To The Future

My sister-in-law says I am the most optimistic person she knows in my family. It’s funny because I’m also the only person in our immediate family who’s attempted suicide so many times, and has of course been very very lucky to have never succeeded.

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Tired Clichés

There’s this thing about simple words that I find peculiar. It’s like a relative of mine who’s life is a mess, quite a bit of it at their own hand. When confronted with a suggestion to go to therapy, they conceded. But when told that they have to take responsibility for her own emotions, they say, “Oh I know I know”. Or, when its suggested that only they can control themselves and no one else, they say, “I know that, I know.”

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Daydreams

I’m such a daydreamer. I like to daydream about accomplishing great things. But I like daydreaming so much, I often forget to actually do them. I live “inside my head”. I think living inside my head has brought its boons and its own drawbacks.

6

Should’ve Been

When I was living in Granby, right after I had to leave CU in Boulder, I saw a therapist every week named Dr. Whitefeather. She had a doctorate in organizational psychology. She was an amazing person. She was special. She rode motorcycles, worked in the phone company, had tattoos, worked at a phone bank, native american, etc. She was just a very varied person, perfect for me. One of the things we talked about early on was the “should’ve beens”. For instance, I “should’ve” gone to college, but I didn’t.

4

Memories

The nice thing about growing up where I grew up is that your memories can be quite varied and unique. Some things can happen in a smaller town that don’t happen in ‘the city’. I know I’ve written about how I’m a city boy, but I think I’d rather have the experiences I had in my childhood than the other way around. Though, sometimes I wonder what it would’ve been like had I lived in the city.

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Life Lessons

In my 31 years of existence on this earth I have learned many life lessons. At least, I’d like to think so, it’s hard to have appropriate pride in your self. Introspection just doesn’t offer as much of a metric to your ‘success’ in life.

8

Gratitude

My mother told me that being grateful is one of the keys to happiness. She told me this after I have expressed how grateful I am for everything in my life multiple times. That makes it sound curt, but it’s not. She helped me buy a new TV, and I’m grateful for that. She’s helped me and been there for me whenever I’ve needed her, whether I’m depressed or angry. She’s my best friend and I love her a lot. I’m grateful that I can have a mother like her.

0

American Life

I’m drinking a Soy latte / I get a double shot / It goes right through my body / And you know / I’m satisfied… hahahaha.

0

My Beautiful Town

My home town is Granby, CO. I grew up there. There was no book store, there was no video game store, and when I was little there were no coffee shops (that I was aware of). A lot of Grand County business is real estate, seasonal jobs, etc. I’ve been a city kid at heart since I was born, it just wasn’t my thing. That’s why eventually I moved to Fort Collins. I thought I’d post a few pictures that I took the yesterday when Maus and I walked around town waiting for the dinner to marinate. I’ll be sharing cool photos from around Fort Collins sometimes.